HAIKU: PRESIDENT PENCE?

By Charles Robert Lindholm

Time For Impeachment

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HAIKU: HE’S CALLED POTUS

By Charles Robert Lindholm

It’s Easy To See

HAIKU: IT’S STORMY AHEAD

By Charles Robert Lindholm

It’s Stormy Ahead

HAIKU: A MULLIGAN?

By Charles Robert Lindholm

The Ten Commandments

An “As We Begin Year Two of Trump” Limerick

It has been quite a while since I wrote a political limerick. I’ve been like many other Americans, unable to suspend my disbelief that Donald Trump was elected President of the United States and hoping that I will awake from this nightmare and find that it was just a bad dream.

Piss Fight

“He’s a madman!”
“He’s deranged!”
So Trump and Kim
In piss fight strange.

They each need timeout in the corner,
Each of these unruly scorners.
Where’s the kindergarten teacher?
Asleep somewhere beneath the bleachers?

Do they think it’s arithmetic,
To seek out who’s the bigger dick?

 

A Few “Nomination Abomination” Limericks

A United States Supreme Court Justice is appointed for life to make legal decisions regarding the constitutionality of the laws of our nation on all levels. A Supreme Court Justice is the watch guard of the ideals on which this great nation was founded. There is a responsibility to both those ideals and We The People. Those Justices have the most real power in this country as their decisions can effect hundreds of millions of people. They are Judges. They are not politicians. Their motivation is right and wrong and a promoting a higher good if it is within the parameters set by the Constitution. Their motivation is not greed or special interest. Now all that is being challenged by the politicians whose only motivation is greed and special interest. And that led to this…

A “Heavenly Healthcare Wakeup Call” Limerick

Round One of the Healthcare Fight is over. Lots of ducking and weaving, no solid blows landed. It may appear that the ACA came out of it unscathed, but remember, that was just Round One which is all about feeling out your opponent (or in Trump’s case, feeling up your opponent – sorry couldn’t resist, the metaphor just hung it out there.)

A “Real Deal To Repeal” Limerick

The recurring theme of the Trump Presidency has been, “What do we know?” We know that Trump is the lying scumbag that he basically told us he was during the campaign. It may be the only thing he didn’t lie about. He was caught on camera and tape. He just tossed it aside as insignificant as long as those easily persuaded by his hate and fear rhetoric and false promises of being a populist leader took the bait. Once he hooked them, reeled them in and won the election, America began what has been a difficult, painful process of trying to discover “What do we know?” His tweets are from The Twilight Zone. He is running a carny sideshow out of the White House. The Russian connection is real. But with regard to the extent, purpose and people involved there is still a lot of “What do we know?” still to be asked. And it is going to have a much louder voice that gains volume from the growing number of Republicans who still believe it is their sworn duty to serve the public and know that Trump does not. They know that the Republican Party is going to die a painful death if they don’t fix this fast….And that led to this……

An “Is The Tide Turning?” Limerick

Trump had a pre-election core of supporters who are white and part of a middle class that is experiencing a decline in their standard of living. They are disillusioned and frustrated by this and feel that the last eight years of government has failed them. Donald Trump represented a chance for them get back what they feel they have lost or have had taken from them. He used proven methods to appeal to their emotions. He was counting on the fact that when emotion runs high, IQ runs low and he could incite them to drop their IQ’s to a level low enough where they would overlook that he is unashamed and unapologetic for being a scumbag and vote for him. It appears that he also feels that if they were dumb enough to vote for him, they deserved what he had in store for them.

A “Game Show Budget From A Game Show Host President” Limerick

When I watched game shows growing up, the losers always went home with “a lovely parting gift.” I can picture Trump and Bannon signing off on the budget and laughing. That budget could be called “a lovely parting gift” for the old, the sick and the poor, while advancing all their Swamp Buddies to the Bonus Rounds, where they play for the real money.

A “Re-writing The Unreality TV Script” Limerick

Low approval ratings. That’s a surprise that President Trump didn’t see coming. How could he after he had such an impressive victory and crushed his opponent in the election, facts about the popular vote notwithstanding? Now his Unreality TV Presidency may be in jeopardy of being cancelled because the people who did not vote in the election and the educated middle class white women who did not want Hillary Clinton to be the first woman President are realizing what a terrible mistake they made. It was these two groups that turned the election and, hopefully, they will have the power to correct the mistake. Trump seems to have forgotten where babies come from and what the most powerful force on Earth is. You don’t mess with Mother Nature without severe consequences, which in this case will save America….And it led to this…..

A “Consumer Protection Defection” Limerick

The Consumer Protection Agency is about to become a thing of the past. Consumer Protection is in direct conflict with corporate profits. Safety, shmafety. They’ll take away a woman’s right to choose because abortion is murder, but we’ll kill the kids after they’re born by removing child safety from food, clothing, and toys. No hypocrisy there. Maybe if the Republicans can find a way to make money off of Planned Parenthood….just thinking out loud…And it led to this….

A “Putz Putts” Limerick

I think that President Trump believed that being the President of The United States was going to be the same thing as being the CEO of his Trump businesses. In the business world that he lives in, there are more deals made on the golf course than in the board room and I believe he truly thinks that will work for him now that he is President. Negotiate a nuclear arms treaty in the snack bar over lunch after the front nine, work out a trade agreement in the men’s locker room while trading “locker room” jokes. It doesn’t quite work like that. In fact, his golfing has been the subject of intense scrutiny regarding how seriously he takes his new job. If he doesn’t get his game together real soon, he may find that America will be taking a Mulligan on the last election.

Russia-gate Limerick #2

On February 15, I wrote a post called “A First Of What I Expect To Be Many ‘Russia-gate’ Limericks.”

https://poetscornerblog.wordpress.com/2017/02/15/a-first-of-what-i-expect-to-be-many-russia-gate-limericks/

I was right. It was the first of many. And the plot has thickened considerably since February 15th. Flynn resigned, Sessions recused himself from any investigation due to his lying during his confirmation hearings. Sessions said he “forgot” and “misspoke.” Investigations are going forward and that means that Trump is breaking out the Roy Cohn/Steve Bannon playbook (which is eerily similar to the Hitler/Goebbels playbook.)

We Have Only Ourselves: Inauguration 2017

 

An overwhelming sense of foreboding
that only time will tell;
Will we be sucked into darkness
and follow the hordes to hell,

or will we, with vigilance and conscience,

An “A Dream Disappears And A Nightmare Reoccurs” Limerick

The Trump Administration is ready to take another shot at an immigration ban. The “if at first you don’t succeed, try, try again” approach to business has worked for him and with no regard for the collateral damage that comes with the “if at first you don’t succeed” part (or comprehension of the scope of damage a government will cause versus a casino going belly up), Trump plows on with his anti-immigration policies and immigrant discrimination. He also took the time, or didn’t take the time until he could avoid it no longer, to denounce the rise of anti-Semitism and heinous anti-Semitic hate crimes, which are terrorist acts and need to be treated as such.

A “Bad Cop, Worst Cop” Limerick

“Shame, Fame, Shmame – what’s the difference?

I was watching news commentary about V.P. Pence’s trip to Europe and his message to NATO. The Vice President had a different message for NATO than what they had been hearing from President Trump when he was campaigning. The question came up as to whom we should believe when Trump says one thing and someone speaking on his behalf says another thing. The commentator suggested that this may be the Trump administration using the old business strategy of “good cop, bad cop” and he remarked that Trump may be a bad actor and type cast the bad cop, but he is good at it…..He’s as good as Meryl Streep in The Devil Wears Prada…..And it led to this………

A Couple of “Trump Takes A Dump…Badly” Limericks

Did he ever think for a minute that he it might be unethical and illegal for him to self-promote his brand after he became President? Ethics and knowledge of the law are clearly not his strong suits as they never entered into his decision making process when he was running his billion dollar businesses. I am sure he was licking his chops at the possibilities of using his platform for self-promotion and he couldn’t wait to use his platform for free advertising. Bet he never thought he’d be doing it from a defensive position…And it led to this….

A “Trump Has Whose Back?”Limerick

http://www.msn.com/en-us/news/politics/trump-begins-assault-on-dodd-frank-financial-regulations/ar-AAmAFNb?li=AA5a8k&ocid=spartandhp

President Trump has set in motion the dismantling of the Federal regulations that were put in place after the 2008 financial crisis which wiped out so many of his supporters, leading to their disillusionment and willingness to turn to anyone who would promise them that he would improve their lots without ever telling them how he was going to do it. Though it may appear that it is “the blind leading the blind,” be sure that Trump has a clear vision of what he is going to do….and not for his blind followers who will be worse off when Trump’s plan goes into effect. And that led to this….

A “What Would Jesus Do?” Limerick

http://www.msn.com/en-us/news/politics/report-administration-drafts-religious-freedom-executive-action/ar-AAmwiUl?li=BBmkt5R&ocid=spartanntp

How is it that so many people that claim to be Christians and cling to the misguided belief that America is a Christian nation show total disregard to the teachings of Jesus? Hypocrisy is living a lie, which would explain how these people would be drawn to a pathological liar instead of guided by The Truth – Love Is God’s Greatest Gift. And that led to this….

A Trump Transparency Limerick

One thing can be said about President Trump – he is completely transparent. He certainly was during the campaign. Sadly, the more outrageous and egregious the revelations, and the more that the fringe and the disillusioned disregarded the misogyny, bigotry and lies, the bolder Trump became. Then the unthinkable happened – those who thought he couldn’t be elected because he is so defective made a bad decision by not voting and the fringe, the disillusioned and the women who rejected Hillary Clinton elected him President. His delusional megalomania increased exponentially. But when faced with a moment of truth – his inauguration and the women’s march – he showed his true colors (which is as close to “truth” that he’s going to come) and turned the vindictive bully loose with his executive orders. Which led to this…..

An “The Anti-Santa Is Making A List”Limerick

I never imagined that The President Of The United States would be a bully. The position of Leader of the Free World demands being a calm and composed Voice Of Reason. That is not what we have been hearing. The not-alternative-fact is that what we’ve been hearing is quite the opposite…And it led to this

A “Will There Be A New Pledge of Allegiance?” Limerick

President Trump may be trying to make good on his campaign promises with his executive orders. This may be as close to him keeping his word that we are going to see; he has gone above and beyond to make sure that the world knows that his word means nothing with his pathological lying. I am sure that many people who voted for him never expected him to go through with all of the things that he told the disenchanted to seduce them. Now many of that constituency will suffer because he is following through with his promises/threats. The problem is that he doesn’t know what he is doing but he trusts Steve Bannon to tell him what to do…And that led to this

A “First Week Of Making America Great Again” Limerick

This quote is from Dan Rather –

“A recurring headline as we document Trump’s first week in office: ‘President Trump Declares War on _________’. Mexico. Immigrants. Women. Scientists. The GOP. Journalists….a dizzying attack on a cross section of people. His executive actions of the last 7 days emphasize division and destruction.”

These are not alternative facts and they led to this…..

A “Goodbye To What Really Makes America Great” Limerick

The Executive Orders are flying out of the Oval Office and they are disturbing to Americans that believe that America is at it’s best when we are a kinder and gentler nation. That was the political ideology of a Republican President who spent his entire life in public service and followed by the two Democratic Presidents that came after him. Sadly, President Bush’s son abandoned it with disastrous results as we went to war and had a brutal recession. Now it appears that kinder and gentler have been cast to the void. Fortunately, we live in a country where We, The People, can bring it back. But until we do…..

A Pictures Worth A 1000 Words Limerick

A “Golden (Shower) Opportunity For A Pundit”Limerick

I have been delirious with joy about my Clemson Tigers winning the National Championship. I thought I might be able to savor it a little longer BUT President Elect Trump has thrust me back into the pundit fray once again. Fortunately for joke writers and unfortunately for The United States, Donald Trump is a laugh a minute when he isn’t scaring the shit out of the country and the world.