From me to me – on Valentines

personal photo

 

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‘Corrupt Carols’ (another free download)

Now that turkey day has passed behind us (or passed thru our behinds), in the mood for some twisted takes on those hideous holiday favorites?

My gift (or perhaps curse) to you for being supportive readers and followers: Corrupt Carols.

Free this Saturday and Sunday (11/30-12/1)

Wishing you a Grinchley good holiday season,
-Dan

rhymeintimeblog.wordpress.com

It’s The Most Horrible Time of the Year

Based on It’s The Most Wonderful Time of the Year.

It’s the most horrible time of the year.
With the kids fricking yelling
While everyone’s telling me “Be of good cheer”.
It’s the most terrible time of the year.

Acetaldehyde Dehydrogenase Deficiency

Corralled in the narrow alley
An incalculable mass of humanity
Drunkenly bumbles and stumbles along,
Skipping in hiccuping rhythm,
Belting (and belching) drinking songs,
With the flow of the fleshy river.

Ole Cowboy

 

 

So, I’m caring for the elderly, and this one late-nighter, a blue-eyed cowboy,

THE GRASS IS GREENER!

photo by Jacco Rienks via Unsplash

By Charles Robert Lindholm

Look Elsie!

Erma was right!

Limerick – Fall

​

Mr. and Mrs. Bee went to skydive to be light

Balloons in belly of a sky, in suits tight

Lighter than air, thin as cloud

Feather landing on moon, proud

Quuen-in-law stung, they so fell back in fright

image: i.pinimg.com

Ravens

Ravens told me my Lenore
Was dead. I said, “I know.”
That’s why I’ve blocked my chamber door.
I’ve had my fill of birds before,
But now their rapping comes once more.
Perhaps there’s hope for poor Lenore?
If not those birds can go.

---

I am linking this to Jilly’s Challenge in honor of Poe’s The Raven and dVerse Quadrille hosted by De Jackson (WhimsyGizmo) where the prompt word is “hope”.

Tyranny of the To Do List

Wrote this poem about three years back but did not post in my blogsite http://www.fleetingmuse.wordpress.com till recently.

Fear and persecution
Of the incomplete to-do-list,
Keeps me awake at night,
Robbing me of my beauty sleep.

Monster Noises

My foot pounds hard upon the floor.
A hand grabs on the bedroom door.
The voice says low, “The monster’s here!”
There’s scrambling feet and giggling fear.

A “Spouse Texting” Limerick

The backspace button’s a valuable tool.
It can prevent you from acting the fool.
Before you hit “send,”
It’s best to pretend…
And comply with the “spouse texting” rule!

For an instructional video – see more

Noisy Silent Nonsense

That noise is mostly silence
Like chatter in one’s mind,
Like giggling done by things that run
And wanting only to have fun,
But fun is hard to find.

Running the Mouth: Butterfly Blues

When I’m here then they move there
Or anywhere than here or where
I think it best to aim my mind.

Sad Wales Scales Tale

@Hemmingplay

Hemmingplay

Kitten Catastrophe

She’s a little domineering;

true, she is…

Dinner Memo

No Doubt

No Doubt

Whether the cup is half full or half empty

Of this I have no doubt,

It depends whether I’m pouring something in

Or drinking something out.

With Love,

Russ

(C) Copyright 2016 Russ Towne

All Rights Reserved

Spring’s Inviting Floras

I’m a daffodil. A daffodil that’s I.

In the sunlight, I’m as yellow as lemon pie.

Pack Mule

She says, “We don’t need a shopping cart

I’ll just get an item or two.”

So why am I clutching thirty three things

When she’s only halfway through?

–Russ Towne

© Copyright 2016 Russ Towne

All Rights Reserved

How?

After thirty-seven years

How slow must I be

That when I’m out with her

She can still trick me?

Why?

When I say I’ll be done in five minutes and she’s waiting for me

She tells me I’m taking ten when it’s only been three

But when she says she needs five minutes for her to be done

I’m still waiting and waiting when it’s been thirty-one!

–Russ Towne

© Copyright 2016 Russ Towne

All Rights Reserved

Read Me The A B C’s

A is for animals.

Buzz off Fly !! ~ haiku

Fly buzzes around my head.

Morning Interruption

Turns out the annoying fly from yesterday

Summer’s Emergence ~ photo’s in early June (Shuswap)

“High Rhyme Time”

There once was this mademoiselle

whose name was tough to spell.

Gain to Loose

If you could make a wish

what would it be?

Truck-in Husband

The husband returns, home, after truck-in.

His hoddie declares:

I-D(o)–A–HO