An Ode To A Bidet Limerick

I have been living overseas since November. It has been the adventure of a lifetime for me. I have enjoyed experiencing so many new things and immersing myself in the culture – literally.

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A Making Stay Home, Stay Safe Fun Limerick

Some Isolation Inspiration

A Shakespearean Solution Limerick

There is nothng funny about the pandemic and what it has done to turn the world and the lives of everyone in it upside down. It would be impossible to write a traditional “joke” limerick with a four line setup and a fifth line punchline about it. However, I hope that I can use a touch of humor to send a serious message by slightly altering one of my best limericks where I take possibly the most famous speech in the English language and give it a Texas twist. I had to take a few liberties with the meter to get the message right

The world was riding high in the saddle,
Now, it’s up a creek with no paddle.
Tis not just nobler in the mind
To sit home on your behind…
It will make this Sea of Troubles skedaddle!

The Pigeon Traveller

Met a pigeon on the tube
on the Metropolitan line
Wondered where he might be going
at this rather early time
Several stations sprang to mind
Canary Wharf was one
And Peckham was another
which rather seemed like fun

Leaving Rhodes

Part 10 of 20 in ‘The Aegean Shores’ series

Another first not seen before
Leaving Rhodes tonight
A big red tug at either end
exerting all their might

Moved the ship out from the berth
into open water
Allowed us to get underway
and moving as we ‘oughta’

Kalamata Castle

Part 4 of 20 in ‘The Aegean Shores’ series

From Kalamata castle
having climbed for just a mile
Several ageing fir trees there
gave respite for a while

The heat was almost tangible
but we were not complaining
As the sun shines here ‘most all the time
But at home it’s probably raining

Beans ‘n’ Broccoli

Beans ‘n’ Broccoli
we have grown
from tiny seeds
when they were sewn

Lilac Lovliness

They grow in abundance
by the railway bridge line
And their fragrance in summer
is completely divine
Their heady perfume
just intoxicates me
So I took this quick picture
for you all to see

The Serial Killer

I still remember my very first victim

He lent me a hammer and died when I hit him.

 

The specialist diagnosed me a ‘psychopath’

Sadly she was later found drowned in the bath.

Running the Mouth: Butterfly Blues

When I’m here then they move there
Or anywhere than here or where
I think it best to aim my mind.

Sad Wales Scales Tale

@Hemmingplay

Hemmingplay

Just a Moment

I used to hate this thing for its ticking,
and now I hate it for its lack.
When I look at its red eyes malevolently,
I can swear that it’s looking back. 
I’ve been stuck in this room for hours,
or maybe it’s even been days. 
The nurse is the only one who tells me a thing,
“Just a moment” is all that she says. 

Atlantic Surge

Outside our porthole
down on deck one
the waves surge against us
and it’s brilliant fun
Because sometimes the sky
we can see as we oughta
whilst the very next moment
we’re all underwater!

A Couple of Limericks

There once was a young lady from Kent

Who lived for a year in a tent

But the scratchy brown grass

Was a pain in the arse

So she is refusing to pay all her rent!

Bellis Perennis

Poetry challenge: Tongue Twister poetry

The Bellis Perennis
is a bit of a menace
and is quite fond of tennis
as it looks like a ball

A Dodoitsu – March 26, 2016

Dodoitsu – Honey-suckers

§§§

under the warm spring sunshine
inside blossoms and bright blooms
bees hop hither and thither
(poor honey-suckers)

© G.s.k. ‘16

Multi-tasking

It’s said that woman

can multi-task

I can see it some times

but I still had to ask

Your body: Haiku

Your body has beautiful lines

Your curves are just so perfect

for one to touch and to caress

Why?

When I say I’ll be done in five minutes and she’s waiting for me

She tells me I’m taking ten when it’s only been three

But when she says she needs five minutes for her to be done

I’m still waiting and waiting when it’s been thirty-one!

–Russ Towne

© Copyright 2016 Russ Towne

All Rights Reserved

Cloud Blankets

You can see why it’s called ‘a blanket of cloud’
‘Cos the sky’s all tucked up in the West
There’s yellow out there suggesting the sun
But it’s staying in bed for a rest

A letter to Santa

Poetry challenge: Christmas poem.

 
 

Santa my letter to you
has lots of wish’s
I do hope that you
can make them come true
peace in the world so that
no more murderous acts occur

The cup.

I’m a little egg cup small and fat

BIG C’s. poem

A humour poem full of C’s

Is it free verse.

Senior Moments III

 

Just had a senior moment
Whilst writing poems in my book
Noticed I’d just missed my stop
Glancing up to take a look

A “Man In The Mirror” Limerick

The Jewish people of the world call this time between Rosh Hashanah and Yom Kippur “The Days of Awe.” This is a time for reflection and introspection and self realization. It is a time for spirituality and fellowship.

I have been doing some reflecting and it led to this self realization

‘Attention’

Concrete-laden, stretched a mile
Wide and spacious, great support.
Sturdy confidant.

Weed

 

It might be a weed
But I don’t care
For it looks really nice
Growing right there
Outside my back door
First thing I see
Going out to the garden
Best place it can be

The thing about the sun

 

The wonderful things about the sun is that
it makes you forgive and forget
Just one day is enough even though all last week
it was cold, overcast and just wet